THE CHANGING “OTHER”
Since ancient times, Aristotle defined human beings as zoon politikon, that is, social animals. Our survival and psychological well-being depend on encounters with others: on being able to share experiences, emotions, and thoughts.
We are cultural beings: we grow through relationships, learn from others, and reflect in them to understand who we are.
In recent decades, however, the very concept of the “other” has undergone a profound transformation. The other is no longer only the physical person with whom we share space and time; increasingly, the other takes the form of a technological device: a phone, a tablet, or a computer screen. Social networks, chats, and messaging apps have made global, continuous, and immediate connection possible, but they have also introduced new psychological and relational dynamics.
One of the main consequences concerns expectations.
Digital communication habituates us to rapid and constant responses, fostering the illusion of permanent contact. When responses are delayed or absent, we experience frustration and discomfort: the ability to wait, a fundamental skill in human relationships, weakens, replaced by impatience and the pursuit of immediate gratification.
Another effect is the increase in social anxiety. Paradoxically, the more connected we are, the more we may feel lonely, observed, or inadequate. Technology mediated relationships amplify social comparison, constant evaluation, and the pressure to always appear “perfect.”
As a result, we often interact more with images and representations than with real people, losing touch with the complexity and depth of authentic relationships.
Technology also changes the rhythm of interactions. Instant digital communication replaces the slowness of face to face dialogue, shared silences, and the gradual intimacy that develops over time. Relationships become performative, measured through likes, messages, and emojis: forms of immediate gratification that may temporarily compensate, but cannot replicate the emotional depth of real presence.
Of course, this is not to demonize technology: digital tools offer extraordinary opportunities for communication, inclusion, and learning.
The key is to recognize that the need for the other cannot be fully replaced by a screen.
The warmth of a voice, the depth of a gaze, the physical closeness remain central to our emotional and social well-being.
The challenge, therefore, is twofold:
- on the one hand, to leverage the potential of technology without turning it into a surrogate for human relationships;
- on the other, to preserve patience, presence, and the ability to build authentic bonds.
Only in this way can we continue to live as social and cultural beings, in line with Aristotle’s insight:
“It is through relationships with others that we find ourselves and our well-being”
